Vol 25: Aimless
Jasper made this video in December of his senior year after I’d made him apply to college. Yes, made him — he was so ambivalent about the whole thing, so not excited. Somehow, knowing that his parents had saved up for his educations made it even more fraught. Oh the pressures of an only child!
I didn’t see the video until after Jasper died (thank you to Liam for sharing it with me!). I think it speaks to the absurdity of the college application process. I wish it were enough for kids to just say, here I am, a young person who wants to learn things, and skip all the test scores and essays. The caption to the video reads, “i am very happy and consider myself very lucky and that isn't fucking sarcasm and this isn't a cry for help okay enjoy,” so take it with the lighthearted intent with which it was made.
I’ve just completed a wild month+ filled with rituals, transformations, and ch-ch-ch-changes. I am tired! Too tired for a thought-out essay. But a satisfied kind of tired. Here’s wishing you a balanced autumn equinox as we teeter between the light and the dark.